How to cross the barrier of unrequited love and fall in love again
“I will never let anyone fall in love, all men – the bastards” – tearfully convince you girlfriend parted with another boyfriend. No matter what caused the breakup, the important thing is that now you madly sick and it seems that nothing and no one will be able to drown out the pain. However, some time passes, and you feel almost recovered from losses, and appeared next to you nice man who, by his attentions hints at a more intimate relationship. You are increasingly thinking about the possibility of love, but are afraid of panic again disappointed.
This happens to almost all women who have experienced a painful gap. They work by blowing the water, despite the fact that the burned quite another beverage. And that’s fine, because in this way the nervous system is trying to prevent another stress. And so she had a lot to endure, the repetition of the performance she did not need. If the old man has changed, betrayed, was compulsive gambling, alcoholic or “sissy”, the girl understandably more intently peering into each new candidate not to “run into” a copy of the ex-boyfriend. Often this “viewing on magnifier” ends in nothing, and the woman is left alone.
But you can not spend all my life in loneliness , fear that betray you again.
Someone gets it before the others and finds the strength to once again believe a loved one. Others are so deeply immersed in the swamp of their own fears and prejudices, that then do not even understand how to get out of it. Those who can not cross the barrier of unrequited love, “Cleo” helping hand and offers to use the tips below.
DO NOT THINK ABOUT THE FORMER
Understand, it’s really hard, but with time it becomes easier. You must be out of his mind all thoughts that you broke up with someone. Need this in order to avoid comparing the new acquaintances with former boyfriend. Constantly remembering the pain he caused you, you risk in each suitor to see at least a traitor and apostate. Say a special thank you to the stereotype, assures us that “all men – to …”. In such a situation is really very difficult to venture at least for some kind of relationship. But if you forget about insults and pain, you can try to plunge into the maelstrom of new passions. Who knows, maybe this is where you will find your happiness?
Constantly remembering the pain he caused you, you risk in each suitor to see at least a traitor and apostate.
PHILOSOPHICALLY
Try to treat the situation philosophically, if you broke up with this man, then it was you do not need. You would not cherish a splinter that was you in the finger, waiting for that one day it will turn into a beautiful flower ? No, you pull out a hurry and it’ll be happy to get rid of this foreign body. So here, if rupture occurred, only for you to meet a new man – a loving, sincere, in general, your. Is because of some splinter you already “pulled”, you miss the love of your life?
UNDERSTAND YOURSELF
You can not blame a man as much as necessary that your relationship came to an end, but have you ever thought about what might well be guilty and you? Psychologists say: often “unrequited love” means only one thing: the partner has not met your expectations . This does not mean that it’s bad, it merely says that you do not want the same. You may have been too demanding as imagined relationship quite differently, and now experiencing, puzzling over the question: “Why is he behaved that way?” Yes, because otherwise he could not! When you understand that you are responsible for too happy end or complete collapse affair, revealed a new sense will become much easier.
Psychologists say: often “unrequited love” means only one thing: the partner does not live up to your expectations.
GO ON DATES
Not necessarily immediately begin to build a new love, you can simply enjoy the freedom from a past relationship, spending a pleasant evening in the company of men, who you love. Raise your self-esteem (probably after parting she fell through the floor), build eyes, flirt – in general, do everything that makes an attractive woman who thus feels that is admired by the opposite sex. Over time, positive emotions displace negative, and you’re ready to open a new love.
Psychologists advise to take a break after break, so as not to project problems from past relationships with new ones. If we talk about the duration of the “break”, the experts claim that six months would be sufficient, although norms and standards in this regard, of course not. The main thing – do not force yourself to fall in love and do not try to drown out the feeling appears. Do not go against yourself, listen to your desires and be happy!